Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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