He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
