I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
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