This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
