I can tuck mytits in my pants
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You were trust falling into bushes
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
