How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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