as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
