Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
