she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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