I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
