Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
