She announced her abortion via fbk
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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