But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
the day after is always just damage control
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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