Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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