If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
