My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
