Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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