How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
