i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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