yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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