8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
