he shaved USA in his pubs
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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