i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
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