My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
