At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize