Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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