His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
