I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
