I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
