i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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