So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I didn't notice because vodka
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
