Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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