So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
