I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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