after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
