If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
