fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
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