Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
