well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
