Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
