Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
