69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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