You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
