you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Randomize
