I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
