Where did you get a picture of my penis
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
