I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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