"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
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