She said her name was "party"
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
