Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
