but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
